The December 2013 edition of Getting a Better Grip, the LeadershipTraction newsletter is now on-line at http://www.leadershiptraction.com/newsletter/getting-a-better-grip-2013-12.pdf. Enjoy!
What happens that causes people to stop listening? Become defensive? Act out?
What happens that causes YOU to activate your fight/flight instinct? Feel triggered?
Results in you saying things that, in retrospect, would have been better left unsaid?
What happens is conflict. And if handled poorly, conflict can cause things to rapidly
unwind – with an unfortunate permanency.
But it’s not that conflict is inherently bad. Conflict is often the spark that shifts good
ideas into great ones; bad ideas into something more palatable. HOW we handle
conflict is much more important than IF there’s a conflict or not.
So what to do if you’re not good with conflict? You could try to AVOID it – but that’s
rarely an option and when it is, it doesn’t really work. Or you could GO BALLISTIC –
but that tends not to work, either, and people remember such Draconian efforts.
The only real thing to do is to become more “Conflict Competent.”
How? A good starting point is for you and your staff to each take the Conflict
Dynamics Profile-Individual (CDP-I) self-assessment. The CDP-I, along with its
personalized debriefing, with yours truly, can identify:
- How CONSTRUCTIVE you each are during conflicts
- How DESTRUCTIVE you each are during conflicts
- What TRIGGERS each of you to be in (real or perceived) conflict
At $295/person, the CDP-I package (assessment, personalized debriefing, and
excellent development guide) is a great way to start the New Year off strong. (It’s an
excellent way to spend-down any remaining 2013 T&D budget monies, as well.)