FEELS Good Versus IS Good

Ever notice that what FEELS good, in the moment, isn’t always what IS good, long-term? And what IS good, long-term, doesn’t always FEEL good, in the moment? (Think exercising, not eating (another) piece of that French Silk pie, getting organized, paying the bills, or any of a variety of household (or workplace) chores.)

The following chart divvies things up into four classes: Class 1 – that which feels good, and is good, too; Class 2 – that which doesn’t feel so good, but actually is good; Class 3 – that which feels good, but actually isn’t so good; and Class 4 – that which doesn’t feel so good, and isn’t so good, either.

feel-is-1

Most of us spend way too much time in Class 3 and 4, and far too little time in Class 1 or 2.

How Much Time Where?

  • Class 4 – spend as little time in Class 4 as absolutely possible and only as much as is absolutely necessary.
  • Class 3 – while better than Class 4, endeavor to spend as little time in Class 3 as absolutely possible and only as much as is absolutely necessary.
  • Class 2 – while better than Class 3 and 4, endeavor to spend as little time in Class 2 as absolutely possible and only as much as is absolutely necessary.
  • Class 1 – spend as much time as you possibly can in Class 1.

feel-is-1a

So how, exactly do you do that? Individual results may vary, but it starts by asking the question, “What would make this a Class 1 activity?” Often, just by asking the question our thoughts start a-poppin’ and a path will make itself known.

“What WOULD Make This a Class 1 Activity?”

  • Class 4 – Criticizing a direct report late Friday afternoon.
  • Class 3 – Sending the feedback via email on late Friday afternoon so you don’t have to face his reaction
  • Class 2 – Sitting down with the employee to share your constructive feedback when you’re so busy that you feel pressured to ‘dump-and-run’ or ‘wrap it up,’ too quickly.

With just a bit of thought and planning, you can easily turn this into a Class 1 activity:

  • Class 1 – Properly prepare for the conversation and schedule it for a day and time that’s mutually doable for you both, where you both can sit down and can talk through your concerns, discuss corrective actions, gain commitment, and schedule a follow-up meeting to assess progress, without either of you feeling rushed or defensive.

See what I mean? Now YOU try it.

What Next?

If this post helped you learn something about yourself, then great! Be sure to share your insight with others as a way of 'locking in' your learning. While you're at it, I'd also appreciate you telling them about the other self-study resources available from LeadershipTraction including:Thanks.

- bz

P.S. If you have a question or comment about this post, just let me know. I'll do my best to get back to you, straightaway.

 

 

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